oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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