I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
She's the barista slut.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
