New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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