David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
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