Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
NoShamevember. You game?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
