so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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