Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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