she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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