she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize