Texts From Last Night

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  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...

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  (339): so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning... http://tfl.nu/swvs
  Replies (40) Good night (618) Bad night (2644)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.

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  (416): The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look. http://tfl.nu/2p75
  Replies (13) Good night (801) Bad night (3416)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife

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  (386): I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife http://tfl.nu/xcgm
  Replies (37) Good night (4022) Bad night (1475)
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  (415): View more from California

  Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok

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  (415): Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok http://tfl.nu/rrpn
  Replies (37) Good night (7301) Bad night (999)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.

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  (240): Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't. http://tfl.nu/mosr
  Replies (12) Good night (4616) Bad night (1171)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...

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  (785): She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before... http://tfl.nu/n0in
  Replies (4) Good night (3460) Bad night (898)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.

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  (309): Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime. http://tfl.nu/y0wv
  Replies (8) Good night (2161) Bad night (975)
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  (845): View more from New York

  It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes

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  (845): It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes http://tfl.nu/nbul
  Replies (9) Good night (665) Bad night (2658)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.

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  (706): Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check. http://tfl.nu/kz2a
  Replies (7) Good night (2551) Bad night (663)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised

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  (336): Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised http://tfl.nu/n641
  Replies (10) Good night (2125) Bad night (722)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.

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  (484): omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers. http://tfl.nu/h63v
  Replies (17) Good night (1087) Bad night (2466)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.

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  (303): You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him. http://tfl.nu/i4cz
  Replies (5) Good night (1070) Bad night (646)
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  (408): View more from California

  You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt

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  (408): You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt http://tfl.nu/y49e
  Replies (2) Good night (1003) Bad night (317)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary

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  (480): Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary http://tfl.nu/ompd
  Replies (3) Good night (338) Bad night (550)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies

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  (580): You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies http://tfl.nu/zkwv
  Replies (3) Good night (591) Bad night (323)

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