we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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