I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.