wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
a search helicopter?!
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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