so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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