if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
