All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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