I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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