Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you http://tfl.nu/tpo5
  Replies (30) Good night (13742) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (636): Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know. http://tfl.nu/4r5f
  Replies (37) Good night (2858) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two. http://tfl.nu/goqt
  Replies (14) Good night (5177) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover" http://tfl.nu/l7y3
  Replies (34) Good night (4757) Bad night (2515)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear. http://tfl.nu/8fu9
  Replies (11) Good night (4669) Bad night (1677)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating http://tfl.nu/fig2
  Replies (7) Good night (2696) Bad night (2359)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour. http://tfl.nu/o2dj
  Replies (6) Good night (3198) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign. http://tfl.nu/14vr
  Replies (1) Good night (1808) Bad night (741)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (928): I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on. http://tfl.nu/43cf
  Replies (4) Good night (1349) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now http://tfl.nu/vnkw
  Replies (7) Good night (1171) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me. http://tfl.nu/p7tl
  Replies (6) Good night (776) Bad night (1467)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): 25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that. http://tfl.nu/kj3r
  Replies (12) Good night (567) Bad night (809)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight http://tfl.nu/hz5m
  Replies (4) Good night (448) Bad night (266)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important http://tfl.nu/fujo
  Replies (2) Good night (649) Bad night (237)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame http://tfl.nu/paxg
  Replies (0) Good night (484) Bad night (139)

Randomize