Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
