At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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