I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize