Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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