I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
