Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Randomize
