Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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