you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
