we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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