He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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