The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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