I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
