look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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