I hope mine doesn't look like that
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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