It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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