Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
