Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
It was confusing and full of hummus
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
