New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
