Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he puts the penis in happiness.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
