in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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