Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
