do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
