I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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