Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
