i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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