I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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