You made me cry and you don't even care
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
