I don't think brook has ever known best
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
