end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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