Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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