i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
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