So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize