Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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